Tag Archives: bollywood

“Where is Teja?” & “When Will He Fix Our Roads?”

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Three kids are arguing as to whose father is the fastest.

One says,
“My father is the fastest, he can overtake the arrow that he shoots with his bow.”

The second one,
“My father is even faster – when he hunts, he can shoot an animal with his gun and run up to the animal before it falls down.”

The third,

“You actually don’t understand what speed is. My father works in municipality. He finishes work at 4:30 pm, but he’s back home by 3:45 pm already.”

Jokes aside, let me begin the article with all due respect to the municipal authorities who have been going all out to resolve citizen complaints. Most of them do. And then there are the others. There is this super annoying thing which is incredibly common in the case of certain municipal corporations.

Frequent Employee Transfers.

Last time when we were so confused about ‘transfers’, we were watching Mr.Bajaj and Teja getting transferred in Andaz Apna Apna.

teja

For the uninitiated, ChangeBhai maintains an extensive employee database of all parties it works with. Needless to say, the database is updated frequently (weekly). Mostly, the moment a citizen issue comes in, we first forward it to the right ground level employee (junior-most) and then work our way up, if not resolved. But, one could have never speculated about the frequency with which the junior most employees are being transferred for certain cities. It is like the guy sitting on top is getting sadistic pleasure in doing so. No kidding. This does happen in India. Read about this case where MD of J&K’s Road Transport Corporation was frequently transferring class iv employees ‘just for a li’l fun’.

Refer to issue #A0561 “Road hasn’t been made for decades”. After visiting the issue site and being assured of resolving the issue by a certain Mr.Safif, nothing happens! Why? Because the gentleman got transferred without any hint or information about his replacement. Seriously, eh?

Now, one has to just wait to hear from the replacement while the road lies in tattered condition. Sheesh. We so wish the new guy comes in and identifies himself like Teja as soon as the confusion begins.

*drumbeats*

TEJA MAIN HOON. MARK IDHAR HAI.

 

WHY ARE WE IN LOVE WITH THIS MAN?

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Kick movie poster
Kick movie poster

Sameer hawa ka jhonkaa.
Jab se aaya hoon, ye do naam hi sun raha hoon. Amar-Prem. Amar-Prem.
Hum yahan ke Robin Hood hain, naam hai Chulbul Pandey.
Radhey naam hai mera.
………………………………….

Show me an Indian who has not heard these dialogues and I will show you a liar.

The kahaani ka keeda:

While cleaning the utensils and listening to ‘Jumme ki raat’ song on her mobile, my kaamwaali bai Lata commented in the morning today,

“Didi, ye ChangeBhai idea aap logon ko Salman Khan se aaya na? Hai na?”

Half-sleeping-half-watching-tv-half-munching-khakhras, I just about managed to raise my eyebrow and give a puzzled wtf expression. She continued…

“Salman Khan!? Changeee?! Bhaiiii? Nahi samjha tumko”

I managed a faint “kuch bhi kya!”

After downing 2 cups of kadak desi chai, I managed to open my eyes and there she was again, sitting in front of me chopping onions and still obsessing over her Sallu.

“Didi, 25 july ko mein late se aayegi, hum log Sallu Bhai ka movie Kick* dekhne ko jaa rahe hain”

“Haan haan thik hai” I mumbled.

After she left, I began to think about the effect this man has on people across all strata of society. During the ChangeBhai conversation, Lata, of course was referring to his change making ways and his charities. He is just not another superstar for them. Speak to the street urchins on Bandra Bandstand and you will know what I mean.

Let’s do a fun task, the good ol’ Fill-In-The-Blanks.

Try filling these blanks.

  1. Dosti Ka Asool hai madam. No ______. No __________.
  2. Agar tum mujhe yuhi dekhti rahi, toh tumhe _________________________.
  3. Hum pe ek ehsaan karna, ki _____________________________
  4. Ek baar jo maine commitment kar di, toh __________________________.
  5. Hum tum mein itne chhed karenge ki ________________________-

Got a 5 / 5 kya ?. Being a true blue Sallu fan, I can answer these questions even in my sleep. :)

Now, let’s try this:

1. Name of the job portal launched by Salman Khan last month ________________
2. His charity brand Being Human works in the field of Healthcare & ___________________
3. Salman khan donated ______________ to the drought hit districts in Maharashtra last year
4. He joined hands with a leading hospital, Fortis to launch an initiative called __________________ to provide free treatment to children with heart defects.
5. He donated _____________ to young children who walked 5-6 kms to their school in Wai.

Kya score aaya? #NoComments. If we can follow this man’s movies religiously, why can’t we do the same for his change making ways and in the process, be a part of the change that he is envisaging. I say, let’s do our small bit and help Kick* all the problems out of our country. Do visit www.ChangeBhai.in and report some issues around you.

*Releasing on 25th July at a theater near you. @Kick Producers, hamara cut bhej dena. :)

Disclaimer: If you are a die-hard Shahrukh Khan fan, a bollywood hater or a wannabe online cribber, you may choose to jump straight to the last line. Oops. This is the last line. Should have placed it on top. Sorry.

No sorry. No thank you. Dosti ka assool.