Monthly Archives: July 2014

I’m just a pothole. Did you hear this song?

Looking at the beautiful weather today, we decide to chuck our regular weekday issue related post and share something you will enjoy.

So Doston, here’s a beautiful song written and performed by an Indian blues rock punk fusion band called G2 Live sent to us by their lead singer Jiten about guess what…Potholes. What else did you think ChangeBhai will post a song about!?! Rainbow! Medak! Pakoda! Aashiqui-3 :)

G2 Live In Full Swing
G2 Live In Full Swing

But… but…hang on…if you think it will be a boring or a preachy kinda song, then you are so wrong!

Close your windows. Turn up your system volume and be ready for some serious head banging. #DhyanSeHaan

Audio clip and song lyrics below.


Song Lyrics :
Staring at the starlight
On a new full moon
Thinking of tomorrow
Same Old doom
Wondering in the daylight
Howz it gonna be
Hoping for an angel
To come n kill me

 I’m just a pothole
Wanna break down n cry
Im just a  pothole
Wud Somebody jus try
I’m just a pothole
For everyone to see
I’m just a pothole
Please set me free

 Woke up last summer
As  the sun shined away
Facing peoples anger
Till the  roller came that day
White linen men
Counting the bucks
Khaki clad workers
Toiled the stoned trucks

 I’m just a pothole
Wanna break down n cry
Im just a  pothole
Wud Somebody jus try
I’m just a pothole
For everyone to see
I’m just a pothole
Please set me free

 Shiny happy people
Forgot about me
Jus the clouds opened
Wont let me be
Back to the horror
People cursed away
Brakes n screeching torture
Mishaps every day

And after listening to this cool song, even if 10% of you guys go ahead and upload a pothole issue on ChangeBhai, this post will be worth it. Totally! C’mon, be an Angel and kill them. Arre..gaane mein likha hai aise. Angel waali baat.

Garbage, Crows, Murder and Mumbai.

Do you know what a ‘Group Of Crows’ is called?


😐 No joke this, Boss. Google Kar lo. “English is a very phunny language”, as Amitabh Bachchan said in some movie. Namak Halal, me thinks.

Do you know where you can see maximum ‘Murders in Daylight’?


No. Am not referring to the underworld problems that this city faced in the not-so-distant past. Am referring to the ‘Crows partying on messy garbage bins’ issue which all Mumbaikars are so incredibly exposed to, that they have absolutely no problem ‘Living With It’.

But, not this user. Check  issue# A0450, Garbage with crows feeding. Do check the comment section to know the entire story. For those, who are in a hurry, here is the picture of the issue.

ChangeBhai Issue# A0450, Garbage with crows feeding

ChangeBhai Issue# A0450, Garbage with crows feeding

The user would witness this gross scene everyday on his way to work. After he reported it to ChangeBhai, we immediately flung into action. MCGM shared their side of the story, which was (yawn if you want):

‘We pick up garbage between 9 am-10 am but the nearby slum dwellers and restaurants throw garbage late in the night, which can be seen by office goers (including the user) before 9 am. Hum kya karein, aap batao??’

This issue# A0450 was strikingly similar to a lot of other garbage issues that we receive on a day to day basis. Check this one for example, issue#A0412, Garbage strews outside bins.

In all these cases, MCGM authority after expressing their helplessness asked us for suggestion on what to do about it. They also add that enforcing a fine does not work with the slum dwellers for obvious reasons.

After long discussions, here is what we suggested and got implemented:

Issue#A0412: MCGM placed a guard on their payroll near the bin to warn the slum people and ask them to throw the garbage in the bin and not outside it.

Issue#A0450: MCGM is placing 3 additional bins of 0.5 tonne capacity each in this densely populated area as it required minimum 2 tonne capacity bins to accommodate the garbage here.

What would you suggest we should have done in such cases?

A. Let the crows party #4BajGayeLekinPartyAbhiBaakiHai

B. Enforce penalties #JebDheeli

C. Do what we did #LageRaho

Do upload issues of your aas-padoss on if you want to ‘pull the plug’ on such murders.

Note: As we always say,  most civic authorities including MCGM are willing to resolve our issues if we work ‘with them’ instead of ‘against them’.  Try it, we say, if you disagree.


Kick movie poster
Kick movie poster

Sameer hawa ka jhonkaa.
Jab se aaya hoon, ye do naam hi sun raha hoon. Amar-Prem. Amar-Prem.
Hum yahan ke Robin Hood hain, naam hai Chulbul Pandey.
Radhey naam hai mera.

Show me an Indian who has not heard these dialogues and I will show you a liar.

The kahaani ka keeda:

While cleaning the utensils and listening to ‘Jumme ki raat’ song on her mobile, my kaamwaali bai Lata commented in the morning today,

“Didi, ye ChangeBhai idea aap logon ko Salman Khan se aaya na? Hai na?”

Half-sleeping-half-watching-tv-half-munching-khakhras, I just about managed to raise my eyebrow and give a puzzled wtf expression. She continued…

“Salman Khan!? Changeee?! Bhaiiii? Nahi samjha tumko”

I managed a faint “kuch bhi kya!”

After downing 2 cups of kadak desi chai, I managed to open my eyes and there she was again, sitting in front of me chopping onions and still obsessing over her Sallu.

“Didi, 25 july ko mein late se aayegi, hum log Sallu Bhai ka movie Kick* dekhne ko jaa rahe hain”

“Haan haan thik hai” I mumbled.

After she left, I began to think about the effect this man has on people across all strata of society. During the ChangeBhai conversation, Lata, of course was referring to his change making ways and his charities. He is just not another superstar for them. Speak to the street urchins on Bandra Bandstand and you will know what I mean.

Let’s do a fun task, the good ol’ Fill-In-The-Blanks.

Try filling these blanks.

  1. Dosti Ka Asool hai madam. No ______. No __________.
  2. Agar tum mujhe yuhi dekhti rahi, toh tumhe _________________________.
  3. Hum pe ek ehsaan karna, ki _____________________________
  4. Ek baar jo maine commitment kar di, toh __________________________.
  5. Hum tum mein itne chhed karenge ki ________________________-

Got a 5 / 5 kya ?. Being a true blue Sallu fan, I can answer these questions even in my sleep. :)

Now, let’s try this:

1. Name of the job portal launched by Salman Khan last month ________________
2. His charity brand Being Human works in the field of Healthcare & ___________________
3. Salman khan donated ______________ to the drought hit districts in Maharashtra last year
4. He joined hands with a leading hospital, Fortis to launch an initiative called __________________ to provide free treatment to children with heart defects.
5. He donated _____________ to young children who walked 5-6 kms to their school in Wai.

Kya score aaya? #NoComments. If we can follow this man’s movies religiously, why can’t we do the same for his change making ways and in the process, be a part of the change that he is envisaging. I say, let’s do our small bit and help Kick* all the problems out of our country. Do visit and report some issues around you.

*Releasing on 25th July at a theater near you. @Kick Producers, hamara cut bhej dena. :)

Disclaimer: If you are a die-hard Shahrukh Khan fan, a bollywood hater or a wannabe online cribber, you may choose to jump straight to the last line. Oops. This is the last line. Should have placed it on top. Sorry.

No sorry. No thank you. Dosti ka assool.



messi changebhai

Weather forecast* says it is going to rain heavily this coming Sunday post midnight (chalo Monday le lo), which is when the much anticipated FIFA World Cup 2014 Final is going to be played between the much deserving Germany and every (chalo most le lo) Indian’s favourite Argentina.

Which means it’s going to rain ‘potholes’ whole night on Indian roads when it will be raining ‘goals’ back in Brazil . Arrgggghhhh. It is going to be very MESSI on Monday morning when all of us are supposed to go to work. Darn!

This is how Germany plans to stop Messi apparently.
This is how Germany plans to stop Messi apparently.

Taking a cue from The Guardian and ESPN’s football journalist Michael Cox’s top secret hush hush strategy (picture above) of ‘How Will Germany Stop Messi?’, I make my strategy on how will I reach my office on Monday morning. Apni apni strategy bana lo doston. Kaam aayegi.

Using historical data of the last 10 years to mark the spots where the possibility of ‘pothole formation’ and ‘garbage collection’ will be maximum post the showers, I am ready with my PLAN to reach office. Here it is:

This is how I plan to reach my office after the match.
This is how I plan to reach my office after the match.

Any guesses who is going to lose ‘IN’ the Germany vs. Argentina FIFA world cup 2014 final. Ahem..if i may

Am not guessing…rehne do…Baad mein joote padenge! @Blog Admin: Am I allowed to edit this blog after the match 😉

Any guesses who is going to lose ‘DURING’ the Germany vs. Argentina FIFA world cup 2014 final. Ju and Mi, eh?

 * This article assumes the weather forecast to hold true. *snigger*  :-) ROFL-LOL-LMFAO-all-in-one #ThisIsIndia

Moral of the ‘article’: Report Potholes & Garbage issues on and avoid making the plan mentioned above for the rest of your life. Enjoy the match! :-)

Why Indians Will Not Forgive Maria Sharapova.

Maria Sharapova, the poor Russian tennis babe was whipped left, right and centre  last week by the netizens of India because bechaari revealed in a recent media interview that she did not know who Sachin Tendulkar is.

My own thoughts when the news came out:

Haye haye. Satyanaash. Kalyug aa gaya bhaiya. Ye kya bol diya isne. :-O

And of course, all hell broke loose in the Indian online space. Like they say, in these popular mythological serials “Charon taraf hahakar mach gaya”.

#WhoIsMariaSharapova was trending worldwide. Indians were trying to shame the Russian by treating her like she was a ‘Nobody’.

Kaun Maria Sharapova? Humein nahi pata. Na ji. Naam hi nahi suna. By God ki kasam.

Courtesy: Getty Images, Cricket Country
Courtesy: Getty Images, Cricket Country

Now we, at ChangeBhai, keep trying different tactics to ensure more and more Indian netizens log on to ChangeBhai and report their neighbourhood issues, toh ek aur chaal sahi because dude, this definitely seems to be working.

So, here we go – Trying to be totally ignorant about issues that are all over the place and are known to everybody.

Which traffic problem? #KaunSiTraffic

Where are the potholes? #KahanHaiPotholes

What is garbage? #YeGarbageKyaHotaHai

Child Labour in India? Naa ji naa. Ho hi nahi sakta.


Let’s see if it works. Don’t tell anyone. Ssssshhhhhhh….

Do you think this will work? If not, then  let’s ‘Deactivate the Denial Mode’ that all of us are in and upload issues on At least 1 issue each.

Disclaimer: We love Sachin Tendulkar aka apna Sachya to death.